To your knowledge self control

MickHewitt said:
I will be quiet for some time. I have no control over my drinking. So must stop!
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Well cut down on drinking but do not stop coming here. We all bring sin with us and though drunkenness is not good for us, one has to have understanding of one living alone and the problems that brings in loneliness and isolation. Drink often fills the place of a partner and so one has to be aware of that, and come to terms with it. To withdraw from what little association one has at such a time is self defeating upon many levels and only exacerbates the problem. What would suite you better is to stay here and have some company rather than fight the problem on your own. Pace yourself with your drinking and set achievable goals in reduction. PM me if you wish and I’ll help you through. Always here for you mick.
 
MickHewitt said:
Me quedaré callado un rato. No puedo controlar mi consumo de alcohol. ¡Así que tengo que parar!
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Si tu me dices ven, lo dejo todo! Estoy aquí querido Mick. Resiste, nos quieren débiles, lucha. Chapurreo inglés, así que hazme videollamada cuando quieras, seguro que terminas riendo de mi acento inglés y la risa es un arma poderosa.
Te quiero mucho. 🫂
 
Shake it off, Mick. Get up and get back on course. We are praying for you.

"For the righteous one may fall seven times, and he will get up again,
But the wicked will be made to stumble by calamity." - Proverbs 24:16
 
MickHewitt said:
I will be quiet for some time. I have no control over my drinking. So must stop!Keep busy,
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Gotta keep busy brother, switch up your routine, might try joining gym. I did, not only does it help the body and mind, you make acquaintances, with the opportunity to give a witness and encourage people. Lots of young fellows looking for mentors. I've personally made several over the last three months. Give it a go my friend.
Keeping busy helps us not become one of those who finds a problem for every solution.
 
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Ana said:
Si tu me dices ven, lo dejo todo! Estoy aquí querido Mick. Resiste, nos quieren débiles, lucha. Chapurreo inglés, así que hazme videollamada cuando quieras, seguro que terminas riendo de mi acento inglés y la risa es un arma poderosa.
Te quiero mucho. 🫂
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Spanish to English
If you tell me to come, I'll drop everything! I'm here, dear Mick. Hang in there, they want us weak, so fight. I speak broken English, so feel free to video call me whenever you want; I'm sure you'll end up laughing at my English accent, and laughter is a powerful weapon.I love you very much.
 
MickHewitt said:
I will be quiet for some time. I have no control over my drinking. So must stop!
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Just letting you know, Mick, that we are 100% behind you and your effort. It takes character to recognize a problem and resolve and commitment to try to do something about it.

Lean on Jehovah and He will help you. He hears our quiet utterances and groanings that other may not be attune to.
(Romans 8:26) . . .In like manner the spirit also joins in with help for our weakness; for the [problem of] what we should pray for as we need to we do not know, but the spirit itself pleads for us with groanings unuttered. . .

We know we are "preaching to the choir" in saying that but reminders are helpful and fortify our determination to push forward. Keep in touch, Mick, either by PM, e-mail or, hopefully, by your presence on the forum where we can all provide the encouragement you need. We are here for you.

Our prayers are with you as you certainly know by now.🙏
 
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MickHewitt said:
I will be quiet for some time. I have no control over my drinking. So must stop!
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This is not something I talk about, but this is something I struggled with for a very long time. Oddly enough, finding this forum, you guys and Robert I quit twice now. The first time was about 3 months, but I hurt my back and I was really struggling with pain, and I started up again. I drank probably for the next two years I guess. But I got to a point where I no longer enjoyed it, except for the first two or three, which would have been fine I guess, if that had been it, but it almost never was. I have always had trouble sleeping, my mind just never stops, and that was one big reason for me. So finally, a year ago this past December 1st I quit for good. And I will never drink again until the New System. One thing that has helped me tremendously however is Hemp derived Delta 9 THC. It's about 1/3 the strength of Marijuana, and it's just enough to help me settle down and relax. I never smoked marijuana never even tried it so I don't have a history abusing that, and it's much more mild, but I know it's not for everyone, especially if you were a pot head in the past.

But brother, I completely understand, this system SUCKS and it's HARD! But the other thing I came to realize is I HAD to QUIT. I knew it for a long time. I prayed about, not as much as I should have, guilty conscience and all that, but I struggled with it. I really beat myself up too, because I had such a hard time quitting. I made myself a promise, if I ever had kids I would quit for sure, I promised my wife I would, and more importantly I BELIEVED it. Well, even then it still took me almost 12 years to quit, and now my daughter is 13. And it plagued me a LOT! But I finally did it, and you can too, just don't give up. Even if you keep drinking, keep telling yourself, "I am going to quit." And I would try...I did try many times.

I will say this too though, it has helped me A LOT, because we are all imperfect, but I felt like something was wrong with me. I kept asking my self, "what is wrong with you?" But quitting has given me a sense of accomplishment that I REALLY REALLY needed. And trust me, it is NOT lost on me, that I finally found the strength to get this problem under control, once I found you guys! I cannot and do not believe that it's just a coincidence. This "congregation" this spiritual banquet where my questions mostly, have been answered. Things about WT that just plagued me, and stumbled me, because deep down I knew something was very wrong with WT, and I just don't think most of the Halls I went to, had Jehovah's spirit. It is different here, and you can feel it, even with our occasional spats with one another and others who show up here.

One thing is for sure, you would NEVER get help from ANY congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses. The problem the Elders have is they have ONE TOOL. Disfellowshipping/private/public reproof, the same thing. And when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. I have had Elders bold faced lie to me, claiming they called me, mind you this was in the weeks right after my brother died, and I had split up with my first wife and this one Elder was telling me he kept calling me, and I didn't pick up. And I thought to myself, "Does he not know I have an answering machine and caller ID and I know he's lying." I even told him, "I have caller ID and an answering machine", I just left out the "and I know you are lying."

Just know this too, Jehovah knows how much we are suffering, and that includes the suffering we cause ourselves with our own imperfections, and I am convinced he understands completely, not like WT's attitude about drinking. Which is to encourage it, but then act like it's the worst thing ever, when they find out it's a problem for you.

Think about this too, when Noah got drunk after the flood, the Bible says he planted a vine. So that took some time. The grapes had to grow, ripen and what not, then they had to ferment, all takes time. So Noah, must have been planning to get drunk. He must have said to himself, "when this is all over with I'm getting drunk." I don't really believe that, just a little joke, but it does seem to me like he was planning it! Just saying. Also, I think Jehovah was like, "yeah i don't blame you and you waited a whole year. " LOL!
 
Nomex said:
This is not something I talk about, but this is something I struggled with for a very long time. Oddly enough, finding this forum, you guys and Robert I quit twice now. The first time was about 3 months, but I hurt my back and I was really struggling with pain, and I started up again. I drank probably for the next two years I guess. But I got to a point where I no longer enjoyed it, except for the first two or three, which would have been fine I guess, if that had been it, but it almost never was. I have always had trouble sleeping, my mind just never stops, and that was one big reason for me. So finally, a year ago this past December 1st I quit for good. And I will never drink again until the New System. One thing that has helped me tremendously however is Hemp derived Delta 9 THC. It's about 1/3 the strength of Marijuana, and it's just enough to help me settle down and relax. I never smoked marijuana never even tried it so I don't have a history abusing that, and it's much more mild, but I know it's not for everyone, especially if you were a pot head in the past.

But brother, I completely understand, this system SUCKS and it's HARD! But the other thing I came to realize is I HAD to QUIT. I knew it for a long time. I prayed about, not as much as I should have, guilty conscience and all that, but I struggled with it. I really beat myself up too, because I had such a hard time quitting. I made myself a promise, if I ever had kids I would quit for sure, I promised my wife I would, and more importantly I BELIEVED it. Well, even then it still took me almost 12 years to quit, and now my daughter is 13. And it plagued me a LOT! But I finally did it, and you can too, just don't give up. Even if you keep drinking, keep telling yourself, "I am going to quit." And I would try...I did try many times.

I will say this too though, it has helped me A LOT, because we are all imperfect, but I felt like something was wrong with me. I kept asking my self, "what is wrong with you?" But quitting has given me a sense of accomplishment that I REALLY REALLY needed. And trust me, it is NOT lost on me, that I finally found the strength to get this problem under control, once I found you guys! I cannot and do not believe that it's just a coincidence. This "congregation" this spiritual banquet where my questions mostly, have been answered. Things about WT that just plagued me, and stumbled me, because deep down I knew something was very wrong with WT, and I just don't think most of the Halls I went to, had Jehovah's spirit. It is different here, and you can feel it, even with our occasional spats with one another and others who show up here.

One thing is for sure, you would NEVER get help from ANY congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses. The problem the Elders have is they have ONE TOOL. Disfellowshipping/private/public reproof, the same thing. And when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. I have had Elders bold faced lie to me, claiming they called me, mind you this was in the weeks right after my brother died, and I had split up with my first wife and this one Elder was telling me he kept calling me, and I didn't pick up. And I thought to myself, "Does he not know I have an answering machine and caller ID and I know he's lying." I even told him, "I have caller ID and an answering machine", I just left out the "and I know you are lying."

Just know this too, Jehovah knows how much we are suffering, and that includes the suffering we cause ourselves with our own imperfections, and I am convinced he understands completely, not like WT's attitude about drinking. Which is to encourage it, but then act like it's the worst thing ever, when they find out it's a problem for you.

Think about this too, when Noah got drunk after the flood, the Bible says he planted a vine. So that took some time. The grapes had to grow, ripen and what not, then they had to ferment, all takes time. So Noah, must have been planning to get drunk. He must have said to himself, "when this is all over with I'm getting drunk." I don't really believe that, just a little joke, but it does seem to me like he was planning it! Just saying. Also, I think Jehovah was like, "yeah i don't blame you and you waited a whole year. " LOL!
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Thanks for your prayers and support which got me through the first three days the worst is over. Christ told us don't get weighed down with over eating and heavy drinking so that that day would overtake us. Well a litre and a half of Vodka a day constitutes heavy drinking...I had tried to stop for two years not being able to get past one day without it. It was heavy knowing I was sinning each day. So you will know how pleased I am to be relieved of that error. Thankyou so much. Rom14:23
 
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MickHewitt said:
Thanks for your prayers and support which got me through the first three days the worst is over. Christ told us don't get weighed down with over eating and heavy drinking so that that day would overtake us. Well a litre and a half of Vodka a day constitutes heavy drinking...I had tried to stop for two years not being able to get past one day without it. It was heavy knowing I was sinning each day. So you will know how pleased I am to be relieved of that error. Thankyou so much. Rom14:23
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I can tell you one thing. All you have to do is not have that first drink. As long as you don't take the first drink, you will never drink a bottle.
 
MickHewitt said:
Thanks for your prayers and support which got me through the first three days the worst is over. Christ told us don't get weighed down with over eating and heavy drinking so that that day would overtake us. Well a litre and a half of Vodka a day constitutes heavy drinking...I had tried to stop for two years not being able to get past one day without it. It was heavy knowing I was sinning each day. So you will know how pleased I am to be relieved of that error. Thankyou so much. Rom14:23
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Yes a liter and a half a day surely does say you have a problem but what concerns me is the fact that you just stopped cold turkey and that could be very dangerous to your health perhaps you should consult with a doctor and get some more information on the matter ,he will probably set you up with a proper nutritional diet which is necessary during this stage as well as some necessary medications to alleviate the stress.
 
Bk Kevin said:
Yes a liter and a half a day surely does say you have a problem but what concerns me is the fact that you just stopped cold turkey and that could be very dangerous to your health perhaps you should consult with a doctor and get some more information on the matter ,he will probably set you up with a proper nutritional diet which is necessary during this stage as well as some necessary medications to alleviate the stress.
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Buy this with the money you'll save from quitting.

 
Watchman said:
I can tell you one thing. All you have to do is not have that first drink. As long as you don't take the first drink, you will never drink a bottle.
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This is basically what really helped me. I kept telling myself, "if I can just stop for a couple days", then two days led to three, and so on. Oh and it helped to not have any alcohol in the house those first few days especially, and weeks. Now I can buy my wife a bottle of wine and it doesn't really bother me. The only thing that really bothers me about it now, is the fcat that I simply cannot drink at all like a "normal person", what ever that is. But it is true, start small, make small goals that build into bigger ones.


MickHewitt said:
which got me through the first three days
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For me three days was a milestone. Just try to focus on the positive things in your life like, "OK, I made it three days, let's make it four", and so on! It helped quite a bit too, to have the success I'd had in the past. It is imperative to latch on to those positive things to build off of. One thing that has really helped me this time too, is I am resolved to the fact I CANNOT DRINK! The last time I quit for a few months I deluded myself into thinking, "maybe I have it under control and can drink moderately. Don't fool yourself. The heartache drinking like that brings just is NOT WORTH IT! That painful realization though, has done wonders for me. I also was convinced drinking was the only thing that brought me happiness. I could not imagine my life without it. I was convinced that drink at the end of the day was what was getting me through it. The truth is, it brought me nothing but heartache. I remember thinking "Am I ever going to be able to live without hangovers?" But now, I really DO NOT miss it.

But latch on to your successes and build off that! Keep us posted too brother, we are here for you, and if you ever need to drop me a PM I'm here, I have been through it all with drinking, and dodged some real bullets along the way too. At least twice I by pure chance avoided a DUI! Almost killed a guy too one time, but that was only partially due to drinking, 1 part drinking and about 20 parts stupidity! I should tell that story some time, but not here!
 
Nomex said:
This is basically what really helped me. I kept telling myself, "if I can just stop for a couple days", then two days led to three, and so on. Oh and it helped to not have any alcohol in the house those first few days especially, and weeks. Now I can buy my wife a bottle of wine and it doesn't really bother me. The only thing that really bothers me about it now, is the fcat that I simply cannot drink at all like a "normal person", what ever that is. But it is true, start small, make small goals that build into bigger ones.



For me three days was a milestone. Just try to focus on the positive things in your life like, "OK, I made it three days, let's make it four", and so on! It helped quite a bit too, to have the success I'd had in the past. It is imperative to latch on to those positive things to build off of. One thing that has really helped me this time too, is I am resolved to the fact I CANNOT DRINK! The last time I quit for a few months I deluded myself into thinking, "maybe I have it under control and can drink moderately. Don't fool yourself. The heartache drinking like that brings just is NOT WORTH IT! That painful realization though, has done wonders for me. I also was convinced drinking was the only thing that brought me happiness. I could not imagine my life without it. I was convinced that drink at the end of the day was what was getting me through it. The truth is, it brought me nothing but heartache. I remember thinking "Am I ever going to be able to live without hangovers?" But now, I really DO NOT miss it.

But latch on to your successes and build off that! Keep us posted too brother, we are here for you, and if you ever need to drop me a PM I'm here, I have been through it all with drinking, and dodged some real bullets along the way too. At least twice I by pure chance avoided a DUI! Almost killed a guy too one time, but that was only partially due to drinking, 1 part drinking and about 20 parts stupidity! I should tell that story some time, but not here!
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Thanks Nomex: Knowing others have got through and are going through recovery is great help.
 
Bk Kevin said:
Yes a liter and a half a day surely does say you have a problem but what concerns me is the fact that you just stopped cold turkey and that could be very dangerous to your health perhaps you should consult with a doctor and get some more information on the matter ,he will probably set you up with a proper nutritional diet which is necessary during this stage as well as some necessary medications to alleviate the stress.
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Yes I was warned by Doctor: He gave me B1 Thiamine and a phone number in case I got into trouble also offered some tablet that reproduces feeling of intoxication and helps with withdrawal but I thought no it's swapping one addiction for another. He warned me early last year showing me results of Gall Bladder and Liver damage. I stupidly thought ah..the trib will be here soon that will sort my drinking out.....Oh how I seduce myself. Thanks Kev thanks all.
 
MickHewitt said:
Thanks for your prayers and support which got me through the first three days the worst is over. Christ told us don't get weighed down with over eating and heavy drinking so that that day would overtake us. Well a litre and a half of Vodka a day constitutes heavy drinking...I had tried to stop for two years not being able to get past one day without it. It was heavy knowing I was sinning each day. So you will know how pleased I am to be relieved of that error. Thankyou so much. Rom14:23
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It is useful for you Mick to picture it slightly differently. You are sinning against yourself Mick, drinking that much, rather than sinning against Jehovah. Love from Jehovah is a construct of insight and empathy. It would not be possible for Jehovah to formulate a manner of living governed by a law called Love, that did not “know all things, hope all things and endure all things, and that never fails,” first and foremost. Judgement comes from sinning, not trying to correct or endure one’s manner of living.

Therefore you may choose to take comfort in the fact that Jehovah’s main concern for you is your welfare - and that is far removed from any “punishment”; and under the law of love, would rather upset Jehovah all the more for your struggles and losses, rather than wishing to inflict yet more suffering upon your very soul. Empathy is a primary law of love and in fulfilment of the law, it would come way before any considered judgement because judgement without empathetic understanding of one’s domestic situation would of itself, nullify any given judgement and therefore make it unjust. There is no love without empathy. (Something watchtower have yet to learn old chum! )Rather, if you keep on praying for understanding, you will without doubt, find far more mettle in your mental armoury than you will in a bottle filled with life’s venom upon your difficult circumstances. Jehovah is a God of love. Allow yourself therefore to be loved. ❤️ Test it - see that it is good.
 
MickHewitt said:
Gracias Nomex: saber que otros han superado esta etapa y están en proceso de recuperación es de gran ayuda.
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Conseguí trabajar en mis inclinaciones suicidas en las reuniones abiertas al público de alcohólicos anóminos. No hay un programa para los suicidas y tenía que buscar opciones. Al fin y al cabo una adicción es como otra adicción, ¿verdad? El proceso es muy parecido. Recuerdo que me planté allí invitada por un chileno exiliado de la dictadura de Pinochet, mataron a su padre de un disparo delante de él cuando tenía 18 años. Bebio desde entonces y llevaba a sus 58 años limpio 20. Fueron un refugio para mi, aquellas reuniones, aquellas personas asumiendo sus catástrofes todos juntos ayudándose. Eso no lo tenía la WT, me fascinó la experiencia. Hoy tengo grandes amigos entre ellos. En casa de nuestros padres ha habido también alcoholismo, y si, ni una sola copa! Si la tomas ya sabes, es como bajarse por la montaña rusa teniendo vértigo y se pasa mal. ¡3 días! Enhorabuena!! ¡Mañana celebramos el 4! Y si lo necesitas, el programa de alcoholicos anónimos funciona. ¡Y siempre puedes predicar de paso!😜
 
Ana said:
Conseguí trabajar en mis inclinaciones suicidas en las reuniones abiertas al público de alcohólicos anóminos. No hay un programa para los suicidas y tenía que buscar opciones. Al fin y al cabo una adicción es como otra adicción, ¿verdad? El proceso es muy parecido. Recuerdo que me planté allí invitada por un chileno exiliado de la dictadura de Pinochet, mataron a su padre de un disparo delante de él cuando tenía 18 años. Bebio desde entonces y llevaba a sus 58 años limpio 20. Fueron un refugio para mi, aquellas reuniones, aquellas personas asumiendo sus catástrofes todos juntos ayudándose. Eso no lo tenía la WT, me fascinó la experiencia. Hoy tengo grandes amigos entre ellos. En casa de nuestros padres ha habido también alcoholismo, y si, ni una sola copa! Si la tomas ya sabes, es como bajarse por la montaña rusa teniendo vértigo y se pasa mal. ¡3 días! Enhorabuena!! ¡Mañana celebramos el 4! Y si lo necesitas, el programa de alcoholicos anónimos funciona. ¡Y siempre puedes predicar de paso!😜
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English:
I managed to work through my suicidal tendencies at open Alcoholics Anonymous meetings. There's no program for suicidal people, so I had to look for other options. After all, one addiction is like another, right? The process is very similar. I remember showing up there, invited by a Chilean man exiled from Pinochet's dictatorship. His father was shot and killed in front of him when he was 18. He had been drinking ever since and, at 58, had been sober for 20 years. Those meetings, those people sharing their struggles and helping each other, became a refuge for me. The Watchtower Society didn't offer that, and I was fascinated by the experience. Today I have great friends among them. There's also a history of alcoholism in my family, and yes, not a single drink! If you have one, you know, it's like getting on a roller coaster when you have vertigo, and it's a terrible experience. Three days! Congratulations!! Tomorrow we'll celebrate four! And if you need it, the Alcoholics Anonymous program works. And you can always preach along the way!
 
BARNABY THE DOG. said:
Judgement comes from sinning, not trying to correct or endure one’s manner of living.
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I think one of WT's biggest failures is they have no idea that it's that effort, even failed effort that really matters to Jehovah. He knows what plagues us each inside at our deepest inner most struggles. I have thought often, "what does it mean to be perfect?" And we cannot answer that, because NONE of us have experienced it, so we have no gauge besides the Bibles example of Jesus, but even that is wholly inadequate, because still, none of us have experienced in ourselves, perfection. The ultimate goal should be to overcome such a damaging habit, but it's not an easy habit to break to be sure, so I think what we really need, is the belief Jehovah knows what each of us individually is going through, and no one understands it like he does, and he sees us as we will be when we are perfect. And he DOES know what that means! I am convinced though, to succeed you have to find that positive measure in your struggles to fuel the struggle. Every day it does get better and easier if you focus on those positive things which move you forward in the direction you need to go. And if you fall back into it, start over as soon as possible!
 
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