Hi there sister,
I can certainly understand what you must be going through. Isn’t it something that all of us on this forum are going through our own unique circumstances for the same reasons but at a different point in time.
As many on this forum know, my husband passed away last year and now it’s been 9 months. About 2 months before he passed, after listening to update #6 it was pretty evident what was going on for sure. Zoom meetings by this time were starting to take their toll anyway. And I was also doing FS 3 or 4 times a week.
Then unexpectedly, October 31,2021, Sunday morning, he was gone. I lost my partner of 38 years whom I expected I would go through the GT with. But at this point, I know I’ll have to go it alone. And then I started to think how I was going to gradually disappear (I didn’t know about fading yet) As it was, we were all having to stay in our houses anyway…. so we didn’t encounter the dreaded virus. So the timing for those who decided to fade at this time was somewhat easier.
I came across ewatchman in September last year but was only reading his commentaries mostly but didn’t come across the talk forum until after and joined in December. I’m thankful to Jehovah for connecting me with friends that still love and worship Jehovah.
Not long after my husband passed I had questioned my elder son in law about the GB way of handling the vaccines. We went back and forth about this, I got nowhere. Of course, now I’m shunned by my daughter and him. There’s also my 8 year old grandson. They won’t be having anything to do with me until “my attitude changes toward Jehovah’s earthly representatives.” They don’t even call or text to check on me…at all.
My other jw relatives have started shunning me too. I know this because recently I saw wedding pictures of one their daughters who got married posted on social media. They have always invited me to family events in the past, so since I didn’t get an invite I imagine they got the memo about me. Oh well
As of now, I haven’t been to the weekday meeting in a month and maybe twice a month on Sunday, sometimes with the video off.
I still get text messages and phone calls from the friends and a couple of the elders.
But you’re right, the zoom meetings have gotten so dull and over simplified…no meat!!
A few years back I was having those same feelings about the meetings. I was afraid my faith was becoming weak. It really worried me too. Our years in the organization were busy,busy,busy. We were involved in most of the activities. I pioneered for years and truly enjoyed those years! So, learning the truth about the truth meant our whole way of life would change as far as serving the WT. Now, it’s just me having to adjust my life without WT…and also life without my partner. This continues to be a big challenge for me to…I can only be thankful to you wonderful friends on this forum for helping me more than you know. But most of all I thank Jehovah because I do without a doubt know he’s been with me through all of this. It’s like I can feel his presence and I know that he hears my painful groaning and pleas as I pray to him with my whole heart.
@StillA_WorshiperOfJah I will keep you in my prayers. I know Jehovah will help you get through this. You know we’re all in this together and sometimes I can imagine our prayers going up to Jehovah and how he must be pleased because we’re making his heart rejoice. Proverbs 27:11